Running after the DNF

 Although I was fine with only completing 130/200 miles and calling it a day I did need to prove that I was still able to run. We had a great mini holiday on the Yorkshire coast with a lazy day SUP at Runswick Bay followed by a great pub meal on a very hot day. This was followed by lots of walks along cliffs, sea birds, seals, exploring caves and finally a superb SUP near Flamborough Head with caves, puffins and so many seals.

A trip to Leeds gave me some free ours to fill and a chance to explore some new footpaths. It wasn't about times or pace just getting out there, running and finding enjoyment. I managed almost 20km and about two and a quarter hours. I explored wooded valleys, sculpture trails, Roundhay park and even a village outside the ring road. I had found my mojo.

Next was to find a bit of a challenge. The Montane shop in Lancaster along with Voom have two challenges local to me. I had done the Dunsop Dash and claimed a place on their leaderboard but not yet tackled the Dunsop Dawdle. It's about 40km with some tough climbs and some fearsome boggy bits. I waited for a reasonable day when the forecast was not torrential rain or gales. I decided to start at Parlick as it meant a much shorter drive for me. Driving over I went through a heavy downpour but then it stopped. I used the stiff climb up Startifants Lane and then up Parlick as a warm up. Starting here meant I would meet the worst of the bogs early on so there was no chance of staying dry or clean. Heading towards Totridge a heavy shower came through followed by hail. At least the wind was on my back. Most of the path was not as bad as I feared but at one pond area I tried to stick by the fence and was suddenly in boggy peaty water well above my knees. 

Not today but you get the idea

The hail stopped and I was enjoying myself. I stuck to the zig zags coming off the top and this saved my quads. There were cows with young calves in the fields but they just ignored me and I was soon on the lanes heading to Burnholme bridge. I was running well and happy with the progress I was making. At Burnholme Farm I made a mistake- the footbridge that had been closed appeared open and I took it. Despite a field of deep pasture I was soon in Dunsop Bridge and running past the play area and out to the water works road. I knew the way from here all the way back. BUT.... in taking the bridge I had unintentionally cut off a loop before the village. I only realised this much later. 

The water works road was easy running and the wet path to Whitendale no worse than usual. The climb round Middle Knoll was wet but not too bad and the field down to Brennand Farm was fine. Huge puddles covered the lane at the bottom but my feet were already wet. Ouster Rake is one of the significant climbs but the views were wonderful and the reward was a nice run down to the Trough road. A short section on the road led to Langden Intake. 

The path up Langden Brook always seems to take longer than I expect but the 'castle' came and went smoothly. The river crossings at Fiensdale were not too deep and next came the big climb up to Fiensdale Head. 

Not much running here but a steady power walk. From the col and up to Fairsnape was more runnable and knowing I was near the end spurred me on. The descent and then climb to Parlick is one of my favourite local routes- it's such a lovely swooping line. And suddenly I was back. Elapsed time 5hrs 37 mins. I moved down the slope a big and sat for a well earned rest. Hold on- it should be more then 40km not less? That's when I realised my mistake. Oh well, a good day out none the less. I'll just have to do it again. It made me believe I could do the proper route in a bit over 6hrs as it is about 3.5km more.

The weather looked reasonable for the following Sunday so off I went again. This time from Dunsop Bridge which meant I got the fastest running along the water works road done first. That went well as did the path to Whitendale and even over to Brenand Farm. Going up Ouster Rake seemed tougher but I was still moving OK and enjoyed the run down to the Trough Road and Langden. Then I felt sure I was slowing a little but it might just have been messing in my head. 

From Fiensdale Head I was more convinced that I was slowing and I am sure I struggled to run up to Fairsnape more than on the Wednesday. 

Certainly I didn't run quite so much to Parlick as this time it would not be the end. Turning towards Totridge I started getting stomach cramps- no idea why and it is not usual for me. I plodded on and avoided a swim this time. I tried to ignore the cramp but it would not go away. Eventually a toilet stop improved matters. I arrived at Burnholme Farm amazed to be only 5-10 mins down on Wednesdays time. Here though I had seriously underestimated what was left. I had woken with a stiff left knee but that had vanished. Now it was a sore left hip and glute. It stopped me from running and I bled time badly from here onwards. On the map the path up Hodder Bank Fell looked OK but it seemed to go on forever and the descent I had expected at the other side was more level than downhill. I hit the estate road before Knowlemere Manor and hoped a short run of under 2km would soon see me back. My body refused to respond and I struggled to run. Then I came across blocked stiles and even though I saw the aqueduct I failed to see the path off right. I added a bit extra along a flooded track with more blocked stiles. Eventually I crossed Thorneyholme bridge and reached Puddleducks and the play area. A disappointing 6hrs 28 I could not believe how long the last 3-4km had taken me. Ah well. Twice in a week and the first female to complete the challenge solo and faster than the group that did it. 

I refuelled at the Village Hall tea shop and so contributed to more play area improvements. A wash in the river cleaned me up but a slip bruised my foot.

Monday was meant to be a recovery walk from Abbeystead but we found the Trough road blocked and so spent the night above Chipping before a run/walk around the Parlick and Fairsnape area.

 My foot felt OK but I finished with a sore back? Starting to think I am falling apart.

Hardmoors 200

 This was meant to be an early celebration of my 65th birthday and proof that age is just a number. I did the race 9 years ago and had fun. Could I do it again. Turns out the answer is NO.  If you want the short version then- I was not good enough or fast enough to meet the cut offs on the day. My 3rd ever DNF and my 1st ever being timed out.

Strangely I came to terms with this quite quickly. I do hope it is not a sign of the future etc as I have lots more I still want to do. Some friends asked if it was the heat but I am not at all sure that it was. Usually I quite like the heat and suffer less than others. I have certainly run long races in equally hot weather. 

Happy at the start

It feels like making excuses but both Bob and I had been moaning all week that we had something around us. Bob kept falling asleep and I lacked energy. 

My support crew

We rocked up on Thursday evening and soon met friends. There were only 36 entries so registration etc was very easy on Friday morning. 

Chat with Hem- so pleased he finished

I had plenty of time to chat to Gary and his mates, Hem and also to introduce myself to Dizzy and Laura the other women racing.

On the race start line I felt fine and really ready to run. The first miles along the Humber estuary from Victoria Dock Hull were flat and fast. It was tricky to decide on pace. 

I knew I needed to bank some time on this first day and to run at every opportunity to make sure cut-offs were met. 

Equally I did not want to run so fast I blew up early. The first 8 miles or so seemed easy and even by Brantingham at 17 miles I felt quite good. I topped up water/MF and checked that I had eaten. It was super hot. I made it to South Cave OK but somewhere in the next miles it all started to go pear shaped. My main memory is of just feeling so tired and sleepy. All supporters on the course were wonderful and very generous with their help. I remember sitting on a van step and then at Arras Wold using a chair and being offered melon.

Still happy here

I had nothing left and it was so early in the race. Shortly after crossing the main road I allowed myself a short lie down- I fell alseep. In fact a couple of runners thought I had passed out. I stirred myself and staggered on to Market Weighton where a kind lady gave me an ice lolly. I was still managing some running but nothing like as much as I had hoped. The next 10 miles seemed to take forever and I was walking more and running less. I reached the 40 mile mark in Millington and tried hard to sort myself out. I ate, topped up my water/MF and tried to be cheerful. 

The first climb went OK and then that was it. I was sleepy again. The wonderful grassy Dales that should be so runnable were just impossible. I think in my heart I knew that if I could not run on a big flat grassy path that I was stuffed and my race was over.  I pushed on slowly to Fridaythorpe and then Thixendale. I was cross with myself for feeling so pathetic but there just didn't seem anything I could do. I tried hard and managed to run a whole section into Wharram Percy and even enjoyed the ridge down to the ruins. A brief lie down in the van at the CP didn't really help much and I should have eaten more but I knew Bob and the van would be at Settrington Beacon.  This spurred me on a bit and suddenly there was Chris moving towards me. What a nice surprise. 

In the van my watch and phone were charged whilst I ate soup, bread and drank tea. It would have been good to stop and eat more but I didn't really have time and was now anxious about the cut offs. Others were also arriving at this CP in a poor state and also feeling sick so struggling with food. I collected my poles here.

I set off alone into the night. Down into Wintringham where I ran a bit, then up the other side where I walked. The super super steep bit was as bad as I remembered and I was grateful for the rope handrail. Turning east towards the coast was a small boost as was knowing that there were still a few runners behind me. Eventually I reached Ganton CP at 74 miles. I was desperate to eat but really didn't fancy pizza. I only just made it to the loo before being spectacularly sick. I went for a 10 min lie down and tried to eat some more. I could not spare more time if I was to reach Filey in time. Somewhere behind me Dizzy, Mark and Kole were having the same problems. 

Not long after the CP a heavy downpour forced me to stop and put a waterproof on. I told myself the cool would help and tried hard to this last section of Wolds. I was still sleepy and this caused me to make a few tiny errors but I was still alert enough to put them right. By Muston I knew I would reach Filey in time but I just could not make myself run. The dawn had come and this usually lifts me but not today. I staggered along the prom, up all the steps and toward the CP and our van out on Filey Brigg. 

Late into Filey

88 miles down but not even half way yet. I had time to lie on the bed and sleep but not enough time to really reast and eat enough. Back in  2017 I arrived here at 3.30am and so had lots of time to really sleep and eat before setting out around 6.30 with some hours in the bank. 

This year I struggled to leave the van before the H110 race started at 8am. These runners streamed past me and a few friends shouted encouragement. I was struggling to run even the good bits and we had not reached all the nasty steps of Hayburn Wyke and Boggle Hole. 

Determined to set off along the Cleveland Way

My memories of the next bits are all  a bit muddled. It was super hot again. I kept seeing Mark and Kole then being on my own again. I had not seen Dizzy so assumed she was just behind me somewhere. Two lovely tail runners/ sweepers joined us before Scarborough. They were lovely, encouraging and seemed impressed with my power march but I knew I needed to be running at least some of this and I just couldn't! Mark and I negotiated the high tide diversion at Scarborough but then he jogged off around the headland. The flat prom should be so easy to run and I was upset and frustrated that I just had no energy.

The Calypo

A ice cold Calypo leaving Scarborough helped me feel better but I still couldn't move any faster. Ravenscar took forever to reach and the long drag up to the CP seemed cruel. I tried to eat here but really just managed a few pieces of fruit. I needed to be eating more. I set off with Mark and Kole. Initially I ran a bit but it didn't last. 

Another hot hill

I was resting more and more. A sit down at the top of Robin Hoods Bay, a lie down and I fell asleep again on the way to Whitby.

At Whitby Abbey Mark was sat forcing down potato mash. Some savoury food would have been good although at the time I am sure I would have struggled to get it down. I treated myself to a huge ice cream at the top near the whale bones. Surely the calories in that would help. I tried to run a bit but I know that by the road at Sandsend I was power walking again. Here I passed Dizzy who was also moving very slowly. Bob had planned to meet me here but the parking had been full so he had gone on the Kettleness. It was only a few miles further and so should not have been a big deal. 

I had a bit of a moment sorting out the route in the mine workings but then got a lovely surprise when Chris came out to meet me. I thought he had gone home to Leeds. Turns out he had done but then he had come back with Alice. I sat in the van and tried to eat. Again I needed to eat more but time was not on my side.

Chris agreed to come with me on the next section. He was probably hoping or expecting a bit of a run or at least a jog. What he got was a staggeringly slow walk. I only had 3-4 hours to reach Saltburn and unless I jogged most of the next bits it was just not going to happen. 

Guardian Angels- the sweep team

I had said to Bob that if I got timed out I would just continue 'outside' of the race. For now I tried to set a goal of Saltburn and so completing the coastal section. The steps down to Runswick Bay were a trial but at least the tide was out. The climb up to the top car park and CP were grim. Mark retired here knowing he could not reach Saltburn in time. 

Trashed quads- the steps hurt

Perhaps I should have stopped too but I was really hoping that I would get through on sheer determination and bloody-mindedness. It was lovely being with Chris through the first bit of this second night but I wish he had seen me doing better. 

Port Musgrave and Staithes came and went before the big climb over Boulby hill. 

Big drop to the right

After this the paths to Skinningrove were easier but I had no energy to run. The huge Iron and steel work were incredibly brightly lit and very noisy. I was now stressing that I had messed up by keeping my tracker and that I should have given it in at Runswick Bay. Fortunately Jo who was in charge at Saltburn drove to Skinningrove and was very understanding. We were offered a lift to the vans parked near the Saltburn CP.  I was timed out. In fact even driving there meant I missed the cut off by almost an hour.

Skinningrove lights

I was sad to stop but knew that pushing on was pointless. It was not much fun and although I could have continued just out of the race my body was really in no fit state to do so.  I was never going to catch up the lost time over the NY Moors. We accepted the lift in the car and fell gratefully into the vans to sleep.

I slept well and refuelled on eggs and bread as usual. I felt 'better' but it is easy to feel that when you are not actually asking much of your body. By 9ish we were all up and agreed to move on to Dikes Lane. This should have been Bob's next support point. It as a gorgeous day and we went for a very slow walk up Rosebury Topping. This proved I was better but far from capable of taking on the remaining race miles as I took several sit downs and could not contemplate running. It was a nice family walk. Bob and I stayed there and I lazed whilst he went up Captain Cooks and did another loop walk. In the evening I went back up the first bit of the hill for the sunset. Yes I was recovering but it was all to late- the final cut off in Helmsley was 8pm. It was good to check the trackers and to see that Laura and Hem bot made it. The really star was Gary who actually won!

Gary who went on to win in an awesome time too

It was not to be. I got over it quickly which is sort of pleasing so long as it doesn't mean I have adjusted to the idea that it is acceptable and that more DNFs will follow.  After my Northern Traverse DNF I was in pieces and so upset for weeks.  This time it was not sudden and I had had many miles to get used to the idea that today I was just not good enough for what was being asked. Well over 130 miles banked with lots of climb. Ah well. Time to lick my mental wounds and move on. On to the next race or challenge and fingers crossed. 

Staithes- the writing says it all

The rest of the week was superb and allowed me to celebrate my birthday. SUP at Runswick on a crazy hot day. Parmo (a first for us) in the pub. Walks at Bempton to to see Gannets, Puffins and more. Walks from Flamborough. A quick trip inland to escape the wind for a SUP on a river before the finale- a SUP at Flamborough with caves, arches, stacks, seals, puffins and more. Superb.